Friday, October 10, 2008

 

An Open Letter to the City of Boston

Dear Boston,

Although I mostly enjoyed my recent visit, I couldn't help but notice that some of your residents seem confused on a basic point. Allow me to clarify.

The middle lane is not for parking.

Thank you.

Sincerely,

Dean Dad

Comments:
The middle lane? Whoa.
 
I spent my summer in Cambridge, MA and had to use some creative parking techniques at times.

We referred to it as "Bulgarian Parking."
 
Ah, driving in Boston ... See, you have to understand that in a sports crazed town such as the Hub, a number of "plays" will help you survive the roads. There's the squeeze play -- where you try to sneak your turn in just as the other light turns green; the pick and roll -- when the guy ahead of you is trying to turn left, you use him as a shiled and make your turn from behind. And then of course there's the screen pass ...

GO SOX!!!
 
It's always fun to watch when they leave home and drive somewhere else.
 
You need to leave the rarified air of Jersey more often. They park that way in Philly also.
 
You left out the fact that they drive on the shoulder of the expressways during rush hour. Such fun!
 
In Paris, they park on the sidewalks!!!
 
You must have been in the South End.
Personally, I find the whole opening up of the breakdown lane for travel during rush hour more problematic. :)
 
I used to think that Boston/Cambridge had crazy drivers. And I couldn't understand why they don't bother putting up all the street signs: Somehow you supposed to know that you are on Massachusetts Ave.

And I thought that drivers are crazy in Europe. I once nearly got hit by a bus as I cross a city street; it was parked thirty feet away when I stepped off the curb.

But then my wife and I went to her home city, New Delhi, India. My favorite sighting was an entire family of four on a motorcycle speeding down the wrong side of the highway. They were taking some precautions: The father was wearing their only crash helmet. Now I know why absolutely nothing my wife sees on an American road fazes her.
 
Apparently, you've never driven through South Philadelphia. . . .
 
Ah, driving on the shoulder. One of the odd things in the US is the way states only put up signs prohibiting something when it is a common practice.

Until NM, I'd never seen a "do not drive on the shoulder" sign except around overcrowded freeway exits where you'd be insane to stop in the main traffic lane. So you see people lined up for an exit on the shoulder, under the "don't do that" signs. But in NM you see them on rural 2-lane roads. Coincidentally, until NM I'd never seen anyone pull onto the shoulder doing 65 to let you pass without having to cross the centerline.

Did I mention that they also seem to have the best paved shoulders anywhere in the US?
 
blah blah blah. Spare me the cocktail party small-talk. If I wanted that from a Dean, I'd go find it IRL. And it goes for the rest of you too. What's next, the other bad manners of the locals? How dreadful the weather there? This post makes Gobstoppers worth the read.
 
Ahhh, we are reminded so very often how easy a platform the internet is for obnoxious personalities/wannabe cyber-bullies - thank you, Jack, for demonstrating that! Word of advice - if usually one doesn't find a particular post worth discussing/'wasting time on', then common sense dictates that one ignores it, rather than spending 'precious time' commenting on that fact. This is a wonderful blog that a lot of us look forward to reading - for both it's 'Dean' and 'non-Dean-related' issues. Deal with it. And in the spirit of democracy, Jack (perhaps an alien concept for you), continue posting obnoxious comments, which I'm sure in most cases, will be completely ignored (I just couldn't help myself this time). Ah, what fun the internet is.
 
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