Wednesday, October 19, 2005


Who Would Play You in a Movie?

An English professor told me yesterday that I look like Gig Young, whoever that is. She reminded me of one of my favorite games. If a major studio made a movie in which you were a major character, who would play you?

It’s trickier than you’d think. There’s physical resemblance, of course, but the actors who most look like you might not capture you best. For example, my striking resemblance to Keanu Reeves notwithstanding, he could never sound like me. :-)

Anthony Edwards could get the personality, but we don’t look much alike. John Cusack could definitely do it, if I’m allowed to ‘round up’ on looks. David Morse, when he was younger. Matthew Broderick, if he were taller. Linus, from Peanuts.

The Wife? Lauren Graham. Brooke Shields or a taller Sandra Bullock could do it. Wendie Malick, about 20 years ago. Sally, from Peanuts.

The Boy? The Tasmanian Devil, from Looney Tunes. Dash, from The Incredibles. Animal, from the Muppets. Snoopy.

The Girl? She couldn’t be captured on film. Woodstock, maybe.

Who would play you?

You did not just use an emoticon, did you?

You have brought shame upon our family!

I spit on your emoticons!

Colon dash left parenthesis!
Your brother is weird.

But more importantly, who would play me?

If I could pick anyone at any time, young Orson Welles. Slap a wig on him and there ya go. A decent physical resemblance, and I think he'd be good at capturing my style. And mammoth pomposity.

If forced to cast from today, probably Jack Black. Same reasons.

I'm not sure whom I'd cast to play the lovely and delightful Mrs. Jerkwater. Hmmm... The wrong answer and I'm in trouble...
Ally Sheedy.

Wherever she may be.


And John Cusack? I'm thinking that seeing as you liked the Gregory Peck idea that there must be some Irish in your background. THe Cusacks and the Pecks both being of the Irish persuasion. (As one just awaiting the arrival of my official Irish citizenship papers, I'm of that persuasion too, so it's not an aspersion)

Did you know that Peck had made a major contribution to UC DUblin? And apparently convinced George Lucas to do the same?

Love the comments about your kids, especially the girl.

Thinking... boy child of mine would be... the very young Sean Penn, circa Fast Times. (But boy child is prettier, less pugilistic than that)
Sorry 'bout the emoticon. A shameful, shameful moment of weakness.

My brother is weird, but in a good way. He's the brains of the family.

Irish? No, but The Wife is. Does that count?
For purely fantasy reasons, I'd like to cast Harrison Ford (from the Raiders of the Lost Ark days, of course, not the doddering, drooling old fool he is now) to play Dean Dad. Then I could visit the set everyday and "coach" HF (heart! heart!) on how to nail (no pun intended) the Dean Dad character.

Every so often, I try to convince Dean Dad that it would be "in his best interest" to purchase and wear an Indiana Jones costume. He never does. Sigh.

But John Cusack is sexy, too.
LOL @ the Wife. And can I just say I am a typical woman of my age in that I have had the biggest crush on John Cusack ever since _Say Anything_ and Lloyd Dobbler. So Dean Dad, you had better be careful, or else you're going to wind up with a bunch of 30- somethings with a crush on you! :)

Who would play me? Winona Ryder. We used to look alike, 15 years (and many pounds) ago. I think she could also capture my own particular strengths and fragilities quite well.
Patricia Arquette, maybe. Or Jodie Foster. Possibly Judy Davis.

For the life of me i can't imagine who would play PK.
An Irish wife is a blessing indeed. So... sure maybe that's why ou liked the idea of Peck as well as Cusack. I dunno.

And to the long suffering wife... there's a Canadian humorist up hear by the aemn of Stuart Maclean... he has a great bit on "Harrison Ford's toes" in one of his collections of stories.

Something makes me think that you and Dean Dad both might like to listen to Stuart Maclean on Sundays on the CBC if you can pull it in, or get it on the web. His show is called "The Vynyl Café"
Dear Dean Dad: I love your blog--it is the only one (besides my husband's) that I follow regularly. Here's a link to a photo of Gig:

When I was in my 20s, everyone said I looked like Petula Clark.

--Professor Mom
Thanks for the link! For the record, I don't see it at all. That said, if he married Elizabeth Montgomery, that ain't so bad...

And yes, an Irish wife is a blessing.

Anyone know where I could find an Indiana Jones costume?...
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Jerkwater, what did you want to say? Get your act together and spit it out.
One more note - I'd cast a ferrett on crack to play The Boy. Do you think PETA would have a problem with that? One hour with The Boy and I'm sure they'd give their okay.
(I tried to use HTML tags but couldn't get 'em to work. The comments came out all funny. Here's what it said, minus the hyperlinks:)

I consulted with Mrs. Jerkwater on this question, and she told me a story I'd forgotten. When a mutual friend called the future Mrs. Jerkwater and told her about me in an attempt to set us up, she described me as "looking like Philip Seymour Hoffman," but blond.

(The setup worked, yes. A year later. It's a long story.)

The missus then added that Hoffman would be the best choice for yers truly. Fine and dandy, though I would have preferred she said Gregory Peck.

For herself, she chose Sara Rue, a sitcom actress. I haven't seen her show ("Less Than Perfect") so I can't say. They do kinda look alike. Could Ms. Rue capture the essence of my sweet patootie? I cannot say.
Ricahrd Gere if he were less gray, less smirking, and less pretty.
Dr. B could sooo be played by Jodie Foster!

I have no idea. I look like no one that I can think of - personality wise? I ask the readers ... and Dr. B, who also knows what I look like.
Ooh, this is hard, but I *heart* John Cusack. If I went on looks, well, no one looks like me. Who I'd want to play me? Someone like Jodie Foster -- who can be brilliant and whose eyes and hair kind of look like mine.
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